He stay by my side ever since you know there's been plenty of opportunities for her to have run away and gone out exploring and perhaps. We done as soon friends or decided to join the happy hear more pleasant family, but she is devoted and loyal. After that you were the right directly from that drink for placing poop and is now. She also tells me and her strange, but funny voice since she stays with me even though. I've moved so many times from place to place and some dorm to dorm she stayed with me even today when she had all that's free and outside and with you know miles and miles and miles hundreds of thousands of miles to go she stayed with me my loving devoted soon, and Poop right after by the rift creamy chocolate ice cream into my mouth right from the carson just so in a way that Jennifer would be totally disgusted at my lack of class if she had been working on a monks the trees and saw me doing it, but I don't think she I don't think she does work sometimes. I feel that she might and I know she did as a child Christmas stocking talked about looking into watching me stuff, but I don't think she does anymore. I think yes and tells me she has much better things to do with her time, and then I believe her but I think I do believe her now because Nothing. Good would come of her doing that to me you know and if I found out she was. she would become even more of a public spectacle that I've already made out to be so I think she knows what's best for her to stay away and let me do I I do wonder about Belle mer relationship with her. So you know it's so confusing you know because sometimes she could say the nicest things to me and other time she can room to me so much with her words and shouldn't if she gives me money and makes me feel like no matter what you know you got my back, and I'll always have someone on my side, but then sometimes she says things are just so cold and so cruel that I feel like I'm truly am alone like I've been alone ever since you passed away, daddy. It makes me feel so sad, but while I was at the park today my thoughts a pleasant. I thought of you eating ice cream with me smoking your cigarettes and talking to you and I felt I felt at peace with the world. I was surrounded by real trees and as well as my imaginary tree Brian who eventually. Eventually cooks me to get up from the wet damp grass and sit in his branches which I did and it continued eat my ice cream, and I offered him some too, but he was so eager to eat his chocolate mousse mud and cake chocolate that our soils that he didn't want anything to do with ice cream. So I finally said a brian your love more for me and more.